Well I did I put my foot down to my youngest child.  Something to the effect of "it's time to get a job and start contributing financially and by the way how about doing some chores."  His response was to take his girlfriend and move out.  Oh well, the only bad thing is she moved here to escape that life and he moved her back into it.  It was rough at first.  I agonized whether I was being too hard, but have ultimately decided that mom can no longer be a doormat for her children.  So gradually I am accepting that I have a right to be respected.  So now it's dad and me and the little foster kiddos.  We are selling this big house and going to rent a smaller one.  It is just way too big.  And then in about three years we are moving back to Louisiana which I think of as my home, so once the changes sink in and I begin living this new chapter in my life, I think it will all be good.